I've been here for the past, I dunno, well, I'd say fifteen years, but I've been coming and going. I was off to Ottawa for a two-year job. And I was in Timmins for six months. And I was in Kitchener for about a year. And before that I was in Alberta, for seven or eight years. Before that, I was in Yukon for a couple years. And before that, I was in BC for about 12 years. I've traveled around a lot. In 1990, after I finished university, I hitchhiked out to Vancouver. I thought I was staying for the summer and spent eighteen years out West in total. Then I decided to move back to Ontario in 2006. My sister had a baby, so I wanted to be close to the family again.

[My sleeping conditions are] pretty bad lately, due to my housing situation. I live in a rooming house and it's quite noisy. For most of my life I was an iron worker, and I was up at five o'clock in the morning, and I was a morning person. I like being up in the morning. It's a great time of day when the sun comes up. But for the last few years, I've stopped working because I had a knee replacement. So [now] I am living in a place where nobody works and they're night owls. So, typically I'm not going to bed till very late and sleep till early afternoon. So, it's a complete reversal of how I've spent my life.

Before, I dreamt on a regular basis and I've kept dream journals at different times in my life. But now I still dream, but it's sporadic just like my sleeping is. And the drug use, too. I was never into using opiates until the last couple years, so that's really changed a lot, too, in how I dream.

I just had a dream while I did some drugs. As I was going out, I woke up and I realized I had dreamt I was in a castle and it was very bright colors and I was just kind of wandering aimlessly. And this castle kept opening up, further and further, no matter how far I explored it was never ending. It kept opening and getting brighter. It was really nice, actually.

One dream I've regularly had over the years is being able to fly. I always drove motorcycles, all my life, [and] a common dream for me is hitting a jump on my motorcycle and not coming down. Sometimes it could be scary, sometimes not, but yeah, you know, wanting to come down, or worrying how I'm gonna get down, but sometimes just going on forever. Sometimes it's not even on the motorcycle. Sometimes it’s on skis. I used to ski a lot. That’s probably the one recurring dream.

I've got dreams that happened twenty years ago and that I still remember very vividly. Just being at a rock concert and running into friends and nothing special happened, but just being surprised at seeing, you know, so and so. That, that was a very long time ago, but that dream has always stuck with me for some reason.

I also had a dream a few years ago where I was a caveman and I didn't realize I was a caveman. It was a real realization in the dream, to realize that I was in fact a caveman. It was really disturbing. I dunno why. It was weird. Just looking at my reflection, you know, looking really hard and thinking that guy looks really familiar. And then I realized that it was in fact me I was looking at. It was about five years ago. I just started using opiates around that time. Not being able to recognize myself is another kind of theme I've had during the length of the drug use. You know, being very disturbed when I can't recognize myself and then I finally realized it is me, you know? I think it's due to my drastic weight loss and stuff too, you know, looking in the mirror, not recognizing myself anymore. I get that in the dreams too. I’ve lost 65 pounds.

I've come quite attached to Moss Park. I find it's my only sense of community. I'm not exactly new to Toronto, but I haven't set down any roots and I only had a few good friends and they've all died in the last few years. Mostly drug overdoses. And so I find myself really isolated right now. This is my only social kind of outlet. Yeah, I really dread the day this place closes, and it's gonna happen. I feel like I really have nothing else. And you know, as far as this drug use goes, I don't know how many people start doing intravenous drugs in their 50s, but I started pretty late. I've had a knee replacement, so I can't work anymore. So that's been a huge change in my life too. I have a very empty life. My long-term relationship ended a few years ago. I lost the job and the woman at around the same time. And picked up a new drug habit at the same time. So, yeah, it hasn't been very good. I'm really thankful for this place.